once i held a super-seed in my womb — made of me and you — but i was confused — and i asked what should i do — and you said the time was wrong — and maybe you were right — but each day i wish we wouldst not make that sacrifice — yeah i got my fancy education — and you slept through the night — but each day i wonder if that one had my deep-brown, or your ice-blue eyes.
i don’t want to die knowing i don’t love anyone.
i have too much emotion to invest in a person to live my life alone.
growing up i was really overweight, got made fun of for being fat, and was very introverted. i was picked on every single day until i decided that i wasn’t going to live my life that way anymore. at the age of 12 i decided to limit my food intake in the worst way, which was eating little to nothing. i would starve myself for hours on end and would then binge. so when i was about 13 i decided that just throwing up my meals after i ate would help. no one really knows this about me, but to this day if i feel guilty enough i purge. i know it isn’t healthy, but in all honesty, i would rather make myself throw up than have junk sitting inside of my body.
at the moment, i’d like to think i live a healthier lifestyle than i did previously. i very rarely purge because i very rarely have to, i’ve been attempting to eat more adequate and nutritious meals, even though i do cheat sometimes. thinking about the toxins that are in some foods completely sicken me, to the point where junk food is no longer as appetizing as it once was.
losing weight is cool as heck, and i’m definitely on the right track to being a better person, inside & out! i’m insanely stoked for what my future holds, only bigger and greater things, i’m sure :)